Christmas Eve

This Christmas has found me in the spirit! We've really decked the halls this year and have lit the advent wreath and sung carols by the tree before bed each night. Lucy seems to understand that Santa Claus will come, Rudolph will lead the way, and you had better be nice. Today, she pointed to the lollipop container (usually reserved for fingernail cutting day) and said, "sugar plums danced in their heads." Boy, is she bright! Kai thinks our neighbor Fergus is Santa, (he does kind of look like him) and will be excited by all that Santa will bring. Lorna is just giddy with excitement even though she had some kind of tummy bug today. It brings back all the magic of the season that I felt as a child. She keeps asking if she's been good enough this year. I keep saying that if I were Santa, I would definitely bring her lots of loot.

Will has been working like crazy and came home at about 4pm today to crash. He is up now assembling the last of Santa's gifts. She children are nestled all snug in their beds and this year, it all feels so complete and perfect.

Merry Christmas!

Extended Family

Before I had kids, I never considered the richness that babysitters would bring to my family’s life. Living far from family, it can become a very insulated family life. I worry about my kids growing up believing that the circle of people who love them is very small. My children are so lucky to have an ever-widening circle of people who love them. When It was just Lorna, we could get away with babysitting swaps and the occasional sitter in the evening. Then we brought our favorite sitter, Jessie, with us when we took a trip to the Caribbean with 4 month-old Kai. She happily spent hours with Lorna in the pool and allowed Will and myself to actually spend some time together and Kai to have quiet nap time. But mostly, she is such a wonderful person and could add much to Lorna’s world. I started feeling more comfortable having more childcare help in my world.I also have “issues” with employing help. I now have three children, run two rental properties and have a husband who works long hours and travels a lot. But somehow I feel like I should be able to do it all. I also feel self-conscious that we can afford it.

Then we met Melanie, who first started coming when I was pregnant with Kai, then one afternoon a week for Mommy to have alone time. She and Lorna had so much fun together doing things that don’t come as naturally to me – coloring Disney princesses, painting fingernails, etc. She came on some trips with us and helped Will and I have more time together. Melanie lived with us when she was between living situations and we all adore her. Melanie and I really bonded during our car trip from Boulder to Tahoe. I think instead of “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy”, there should also be hip college student for the stay at home mom. She helped me get on facebook, even told me that it was “cute” that people my age did facebook, introduced me to new music and the latest fashion trends. Melanie just left for the Peace Corps in the Ukraine, and although I miss her dearly I am so glad to read about her grand adventures and know that she will always be in our lives.

And now we have Kelsey who has also been adopted as a family member. She was sitting for us 2 afternoons a week when we decided to adopt Lucy. When we didn’t know if we were facing a summer of medical appointments, decided that we would ask Kelsey to start full-time with us for the summer. She also helps me with the management of the rentals. Now she’s with us for 24 hours a week and I’m not sure what I’d do without her. Yesterday, Lorna and I came home from the park and Kelsey had “fancy nancy hair salon” remnants in her dreadlocks and had the kids fingerpainting outside. Sometimes she does yoga with them or plays her banjo. She’s even teaching Lorna to play the violin!

Now I know that babysitters can enhance all of our lives. It was the control-freak in me that resisted having more help. All of us love Kelsey and I am a better mom to my kids for having a breather and sitting in a coffee shop with a latte and laptop, like right now. Will and I are a stronger couple because we can finish a conversation and have some experiences that don’t involve the kids. I can have one – on-one time with each kid and we all are better people for having known these great young women. Next fall, Lucy and Kai will have preschool three mornings a week and Lorna will be in school until 3, so again, it’s a short time to have this luxury.

Six Months!

Lucy has been living with us for six months as of today, December 5. To celebrate, I got gobs of take out Chinese food for all of us. Her fortune cookie read, "Your greatest traits are your courage and eagerness." How true that cookie is! She astounds me sometimes with both her courage and eagerness. She loves going to mom-tot gymnastics and so many so many new tasks she has been asked to do, she did with caution the first day and now she is fearless, enthusiastic and very successful - like jumping on a trampoline or into a foam pit or even swinging on a trapeze. Even her understanding of the teacher's words were limited, but now she's raising her hand when asked for volunteers to go first, or explaining to a boy that he has cut in line.

Her English is 80% of what Lorna's was at the same age. Yesterday, she asked, "did you like that, mommy?" Now, the ESL teacher in me recognizes her ability to use helping verbs to form a question - very advanced, the ability to put the question into the past tense and the social ability to ask someone's preferences. She knows the abc song, can sing twinkle, twinkle, can count and is starting to recognize letters. On the flip side, her Chinese is vanishing. We've started listening to some Chinese language tapes while driving around town. Every once in a while she will repeat after the tape with obvious fluency and perfect mandarin tones, but mostly it's Kai who's most vocal in the back seat. (Lorna says it's too hard, but I gotta say that Kai is pretty good!) I'd love to try to find a kid-friendly Mandarin tutor, but will watch how it affects her emotionally. I just want her to keep some of her birth culture if she's up for it too!

But the biggest change for Miss Lucy has probably been to adjust to living with a family. She knows how to be heard - that's a polite way of saying that she can be a very loud 25 pounds - but she must have had to be pretty scrappy in the orphanage. She sometimes comes to me whining and I ask what she needs, she now say's, "just lovin', momma." That I can do! She's been easy to fall in love with. We are so lucky!